i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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