Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
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