I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Randomize
