so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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