Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
This couple is walking their pig around campus
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
