Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
ugly people sure do ruin things
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize
