I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Success! We fucked roommates!
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