And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Randomize
