based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
as a side note pls kill me
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
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