Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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