What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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