Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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