But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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