Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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