I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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