Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
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He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
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Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
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