Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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