Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
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