hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Randomize
