After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
