Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
When are your genitals available?
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
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