so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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