Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize