I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
