there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
