i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
