They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize