get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
She told me I should be a condom model.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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