Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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