You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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