ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
vagina is talking i cant
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Randomize
