When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND