Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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