Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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