sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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