Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
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