Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize