awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
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