hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
We named our party play list daddy issues
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize