So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Randomize
