Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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