You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Why is there bacon in the couch?
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Randomize