I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
where are my eyebrows?
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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