i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
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I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
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