i just wanna soil my oats bro
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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