Where is the hickey?
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize
