she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
