We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
