if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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