is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Randomize
