Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
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