found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Randomize
