we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
