One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
