I wanna bring you to show and tell
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
