sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
